Devastated at the rate you fell below me

Today we should all call someone a slut. Mix it up. Try it under your breath. Try yelling it. Try emphasizing the s, or the t, or the l. Try dragging it out, like this: "Ssssssllllllllllut!" Try it on your mother when she calls to finalize the family Thanksgiving plans, you slut.

:::

I had three (3) horrible nightmares last night. After the second one, I turned on the light to check my closet -- something I haven't done in oodles -- and then stayed awake to keep from falling back into the nightmare. Thanks for the heads up, Dane. You silly.

So murderers are chasing me. Then rapists. Then a janitor, whose pinky I bit off in another dream I had back in second grade. I was like a baked ham, people. Everyone wanted a taste.

:::

I understand there will be snow in Tennessee before it snows in New York. You kids enjoy the talented drivers down there. All the panicked swerving. God, I miss it. Reminds me of the time I drove up here from Murfreesboro and inserted my car directly into a snow drift, where it remained stuck for two weeks. Because I didn't know.