Mewwy Twismas

The T9 word function on my cell phone often amuses me. If you're technotarded (props to Lindsey "Refrigerator Perry" Turner for that dollop of genius), T9 is a text messaging technique that allows your cell to figure out what you're going to say so you don't have to click a button numerous times to reach the correct letter. Recently, I made a move to send the message, "We left Pete's plates at Jen's house," which my phone translated to, "We left Pete's slaves at Jen's house."

Psha. Like Pete would ever let me borrow his slaves.

I purchased my first Christmas present today. Thanks, Amazon, for hanging out around my desk, waiting to pick my guilty pocket night after night. I do believe Jesus's shit was whittled out of blessed plywood and myrrh, so why am I forking out $30 to buy Craig an electric griddle? I should just finagle one out of frankincense.

Tomorrow is my day off. I'd like to spend all day eating candied avocados and watching this. Instead, I'll take another walk to the Sears Pond here in Flanders and spend some time at the library working on my thesucks. I've also got a date with my dart team partners and all-around friends, Jess and Frank. We're going to watch a Christmas movie and string dried cranberries and popcorn to decorate their tree. I truly dig things of that nature. I'm gonna make a great old broad.